Six Degrees Of Psychotic Hell
by Catalystic Regency
Summary: A space virus' sick game of vengeance leads to the unraveling of Corneria's greatest secret, and the inevitable apocalypse of the universe ensues. Rated T for violence and gore, strong language, and mild sexual situations between cyborgs and Lylatians.
1. Chapter 1

**Six Degrees Of Psychotic Hell****Disclaimer:** Fox McCloud, Falco Lombardi, Slippy Toad, Peppy Hare, Katt Monroe, General Pepper, Wolf O' Donnel, Leon Powalski, Pigma Dengar and Andrew Oikanny are the intellectual properties of Nintendo. They are being used without permission in a manner that does not involve profit.

Fara Phoenix is the property of Nintendo Power and Benimaru Itoh.

Aztoph, Syn-Gyr, Colonel Desalte, the Asagians, the monster trio and the "uber-thing" are the intellectual properties of Kaiser Scott. Use them without my permission, and I will castrate you via Showtime Knife.

**Author's Note:** Let the psychotic hell begin! Beware the cheese monster that is SYN-GYR!!!

**Episode 1: Asylum Dance**

The surreal cloudy skies of Asagia crumbled as the brutal planetary storm raged on. Ungodly amounts of rain poured from its heavens, and the oceans that submerged the planet grew further still, and soon became more violent. The thunderous claps of the waves smashing into the only bit of land added on to the pandemonium. On top of this land (actually a jagged mountain), was the infamous Asagian asylum.

The wicked structure stood silent and tall amidst the storm's cacophony. Inside this installation lingered the over-world population of Asagians. These creatures were of a deep purple, slimy, and quite dangerous with their massive claws which adorned their hands and feet. They wore heavy imported armor, as their bodies were fragile, but used no advanced weaponry due to their innate, animalistic equipment.

Their odd interests in the mentally disturbed is what set this amphibious race apart from others in this unnamed, backwater system. So very intrigued in fact, that they built a sanctuary to house and study them.

Mostly, their dysfunctional guests were shipped from the fourth planet of the Lylat System; Corneria. Patients locked away in the barren, stain-covered rooms were diverse -- they ranged from veterans whose war never really died, to maniacal serial killers who took pleasure in hacking apart the innocent. Security was extremely tight in the asylum, especially for the latter, and the Asagians took pride in operating an inescapable asylum. Breakouts were unheard of, and even if by some chance an escapee managed to find a way outside, there would be no way off of the highest peak. They would either be captured again, or face the wrath of an endless storm, and the raging sea below.

Sometimes, their shipments were special cases, as they were meant to stay inside for the universe's sake, and their own. But the walls soon closed in, and the urge to escape filled them to the brink.

A single security guard made his way down the claustrophobic hallway, systematically peeking through the small openings of the prison cell doors, checking for anything that struck him as odd. When he finally came to the last cell of the first floor, he squinted a golden eye with a horizontal iris, and spotted the two slumbering forms inside.

One of them, a blue, rugged-looking falcon of prodigious height, lay upon one of two old, uncomfortable beds that were present in every room. His name was apparently Falco Lombardi, and he wasn't here for being a danger to civilization, or himself. Rather, he tagged along to give the "cybernetic psychopath" some company.

The other guest with the curiously-given label was bound to the wall with three steel restraints going across his upper and lower torso. He bore the name of Aztoph, and he was unlike anything they had ever seen before. He looked like an ape, only his partially visible face suggested something more advanced. Thick, broad silver armor covered most of his form, while a tight, full-body suit kept him warm underneath. Each piece of armor, including the streamlined helmet which grazed the wall behind him, was marked with wavy black details. Lastly, a considerable amount of spiky brown hair hung out from an opening in the back of his headpiece.

Satisfied with what he saw, the Asagian guard huffed and grumbled to himself as he proceeded to the next floor, unaware that Falco had been feigning his sleep the whole time.

"Hey Az, you awake?" the avian asked after opening his azure eyes and sitting up.

"Yes. I've been awake for a few days, now." Aztoph replied dryly. "Is there something you require?"

"Nah, just thinking about getting the hell out of this place." Falco said as he jumped off the bed. He approached the bound cyborg, and put his hand on one of the restraints. "Want me to try and pull these things off?"

"Go right on ahead..."

With this said, Falco put both hands on top of the steel bound, and started to pull. Nothing happened. Clenching his teeth, he put a foot up against the wall and gave it one final tug before backing off, panting and trying to regain his breath. Aztoph merely smiled, and broke through his restraints with ease.

"Sorry, I forgot to mention that I've been regenerating the energy those Asagians sapped from me. So I've got my strength back." he chuckled, "Seeing you strain like that was still rather humorous, though."

"Oh piss off." the bird of prey gave his friend a light shove, and walked over to the door which kept them sealed away. He peered through it, and gave Aztoph a nod. "The coast is clear. Care to take this door down for me?"

Aztoph hesitated, feeling a bit uneasy about the familiar, evil presence he felt in another room, but shook it off once Falco vocally expressed his impatience. The cyborg pulled his arm back and released, denting the heavy rusted door with an iron-clad fist and breaking it clean off its hinges. It hit the wall with a loud resounding thud -- but fortunately, the door's echo didn't attract the attention of the guards patrolling the higher levels.

Falco crept out of the cell and into the dark, vapid hallway, with Aztoph close behind him.

"They definitely need to upgrade their security..." said the cyborg as he looked about, taking a mental note of the obscure ruckus emitting from a few cells down.

Lombardi sniggered quietly. "Yeah. A few anti-cyborg measures, and some friggin' cameras would help."

"...Something's not right."

Suddenly, a nearby door fell from where it stood, and the disgusting prisoner inside staggered out, making the oddest of noises as the tips of its metal high heels touched the floor. It stared lifelessly at both avian and cybernetic organism with a single, glowing emerald eye. Twisted muscle and badly decomposed flesh wrapped around its armless upper torso, and its small head was positioned on what looked to be shoulders, as it had no neck to speak of. An appendage resembling a scorpion's metsoma dangled loosely from behind. Deep purple pants covered the creature's lower half, and its name, which Aztoph knew all too well, was Syn-Gyr.

"Virus..." Aztoph murmured, at a loss for anything else to say.

"Ahhh, samurai!" Syn-Gyr exclaimed, his voice deep and throaty, "I thought I felt you through the walls of this lovely madhouse! Yes. The place where you will be buried! So let us dance once again!"

"Sorry asshole, maybe some other time!" Falco then grabbed hold of his companion's hand, and took off in the opposite direction. "Let's go!"

The two cut through the shadows of the asylum, not once looking back to see if they were being followed by the grotesque lifeform. Moments later, the man in silver armor recalled the many security checkpoints of this installation, and brought it to Falco's attention as they continued on. The bird-of-prey gave Aztoph a nod, and allowed him to take the lead. One of the aforementioned points eventually came into view, and the two Asagians behind it broke out in panic.

"Dammit!" Cursed the higher ranked one, "Lombardi and his robot have escaped! Reinforce the checkpoint!"

"O-okay!" The subservient half squeaked as he pulled down a lever. A bulky shutter lowered from the hidden ceiling above and covered the steel doors, giving them a great deal of additional defense.

Aztoph increased his pace, paying no mind to the strengthened position. He let go of Falco's hand and rammed shoulder-first into the shutter, tearing through solid metal with relative ease, and frightening the frog-like creatures so badly, they curled up and started to beg for their lives.

Falco stepped through the freshly-made entrance and chuckled at the pathetic sight. "That's more like it."

The two escapees wasted no time in moving on, leaving the cowardly amphibians behind. After they had disappeared from sight, the lesser Asagian got to his feet and helped his superior up from the ground. They had no peace of mind for long, once Syn-Gyr dropped from out of nowhere, and startled them back to the position they were in before. He snarled at them, baring those rotten, brownish teeth and spoke loudly above their whimpering;

"The samurai and the parrot came through here. Yes. And scared the little froggies. Heheheh..."

He stepped through the hole made by the so-called "samurai", and hovered up into the pitch-black sea above. The pair of Asagians simply sighed deeply, thankful that their lives were spared both times.

A few minutes later, Falco and Aztoph were already well past the main entrance of the asylum (and most of the security points). Unlike what most believed, there was a way out of this place, and that happened to be through the docking bay, where officials kept their personal luxury yachts. But much to their dismay, it was guarded by a massive security door, far larger than anything they had previously encountered. To make matters worse, it required a password to open. Falco ripped open the keypad while cursing silently, and examined the colorful wiring that fell out.

"Falco," Aztoph began, "I just realized that we're well past the quarantine room. That's where they have my katana..."

"We ain't going back, man." replied Falco, "I'll buy you a new one after we get outta here, alright?"

"Bah. Fine." he crossed his arms and grumbled inaudibly.

"Good boy." the avian grinned, soon returning his attention to the task at hand, "Just give me a few moments and I should have this thing hotwired..."

Syn-Gyr expectedly landed behind them, and peculiarly enough, he had picked up Aztoph's katana along the way. He dropped it out of his mouth, and stared up at his much-loathed enemy. "I was kind enough to fetch your sword! Now fight me! I demand it!"

"...Got it!"

The gargantuan obstruction rattled as it lowered itself into the ground. Falco instantly ran through, heading straight for the nearest cruiser. He raced up the metal ramp coming from the majestic yacht's belly, and into the control room. Jumping into the pilot's seat, he turned on the main engines with the flip of a switch, and the ship sprung to life again. "Az, c'mon!" He shouted through the electro-acoustic transducer. Aztoph turned to the direction of the falcon's gruff voice, and back at the anxious space virus. With a sly grin, he snatched up his katana from the floor, slid it down the protective sheath hanging from his right thigh, and then sped into docking bay.

The virus thundered in exasperation, and his entire body began to shake. A series of wet sloshing noises followed, as something within pushed against his encased upper torso. He painfully bellowed, his sides bulging out considerably until eight thin spidery arms burst out. Gooey liquid dripped from his new limbs that made terrible crunching noises each time they twitched, or wriggled. The luminous orb deep inside the socket flickered, and a bit of drool escaped his revolting maw. Syn-Gyr muttered something under his breath and continued the pursuit once again.

Aztoph leapt into the narrow hole underneath the ship, and the boarding ramp was hurriedly lifted and retracted. The cyborg fell into his own accommodation and buckled himself in. Falco gave him a thumbs up, and directed the yacht down the bay, gradually increasing speed as they neared the exit. Both nearly jumped out of their seats when Syn-Gyr slammed himself into the cockpit's exterior.

"You're not leaving!" he screamed, but neither of the ship's hijackers could understand him.

"Great, I can't see a damned thing, now..." The Lylatian rolled his eyes and pressed a small button with the words "Clean Cockpit" under it. The wipers were activated, and they swept in unison across the glass, pushing Syn-Gyr to the side right before the luxurious cruiser blasted off, leaving the asylum behind with a tarnished reputation

The virus watched the yacht ascend into the tempestuous skies above, the feeling of absolute futility coming over him. With a vicious scream, he took out his frustrations on the surrounding area, denting nearby ships and smashing bits of cargo, while blaring out over and over again the nickname he had given Aztoph. Then he remained still for a moment, breathing heavily as twisted new ideas came into being. He raised his only eye up to the chaotic sky and smirked. "Perhaps you do fit into my plans." he murmured, "Perhaps this situation is better than I believe it to be..."

Well beyond planet Asagia, the infinite sea of dark matter came into sight, along with the countless shimmering stars and ghostly nebulae of this system. A worn out Falco exhaled loudly, relieved they were far away from that insane place. "Thank god that's over..." he said.

"Agreed." came the response from Aztoph, "It's good to be out in the open, again."

"Well, now where do we go?"

A goofy smile spread across the cyborg's normally bland face. "...Let's go to Corneria, and give the good General a bit of a surprise."

"Heh. Fine with me. Setting a course for Corneria..." Lombardi pushed a few more buttons, and pulled a lever down. A moderately loud humming noise was heard, and the ship's speed became aggrandized. "Activated the hyper drives, and putting her in auto-pilot. We should be there in about... twenty minutes."

"Enough time for a short nap." Unbuckling himself from the co-pilot's seat, Aztoph wandered down the clean bridge of the yacht, peeking through the numerous rooms until he found what he was looking for; a nice darkened storage area. He walked inside and settled down, closing his hidden eyes as the ship moved onward.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: **I'm trying my hand at "showing" this time around, so my writing might seem a little bit shaky. Just bear with me here, alright?

As with everything I write, the second chapter gives the story a uniqueness that sets it apart from the rest. Even though the first chapter of Six Degrees was pretty unique to begin with...

Enjoy.

**Episode 2: A General's Warm Welcome**

Aztoph opened a single eye, mumbling. His incoherent babble ceased with a sudden, sharp gasp -- metal crates of numerous sizes tipped over, crashing to the ground. He offered a loud yawn and made an attempt to slip back into the depths of unconsciousness. Seconds later, his eyes shot open again, hearing a thunderous booming sound.

Outside, and rather unbeknownst to him, the hijacked yacht dropped out of hyperspace, appearing in orbit above the blue, hazy-clouded planet of Corneria. The yacht, captured by both Aztoph and Falco in a prior engagement, set a standard orbit course, above a satellite, pointing at the planet's surface.

The cyborg returned to his feet, stretching and shaking the fatigue out of his limbs. As he did so, he recalled the privilage of being bound to a wall in a prison cell, bare of clocks and windows; he processed the memories of having to watch his Lylatian companion gorge down rotten, maggot-infested food. He assumed Falco would've preferred starving to death -- however, the routine check ups and force-feeding procedures of their Asagian captors stopped him from doing so. For once, Aztoph didn't regret the lack of functioning papillae on his tongue.

After he finished, Aztoph exited the darkened storage room and lumbered down the bridge, his heavy boots creating loud thumps as they fell against the steel flooring. He scanned the yacht's drab white walls through his glowing visor, failing to comprehend how anyone could consider such blandness as luxery. Even the ghastly, timeworn walls of the asylum provided more exciting visage than this.

In the yacht's control deck, Falco sat slumped in his chair, baring a nonchalent look on his face. Then, his internal ears picked up the echos of footsteps and the feint sounds of clanking metal. The automated door seperating the bridge from the flight deck opened, and out of the corner of his eye Falco noticed an approaching figure. He spun his chair around and looked up at the intimidating cyborg, and in a soft, surprising voice he spoke to him; "Did you sleep well?"

"I suppose." Aztoph replied, now standing motionless in front of the reflective cockpit window, gazing out and admiring the fourth planet's distant beauty. "Twenty minutes of sleep is hardly refreshing though, considering that I spent my time in the nuthouse recharging drained energy, and not slumbering away like you..." He crossed his arms and sat himself down on the co-pilot's seat, expecting the usual, overblown response from the avian.

"Well shit, go back to sleep if you're gonna be a bitch." Falco growled, spinning once again to face the digital instrument panel that emitted a plethora of neon colors. "I never said you _had_ to get up when we arrived."

"Yes, but I didn't want to keep you waiting." Aztoph retorted. With a slight grin beginning to form, he added, "You _are_ an impatient one, you know."

Flustered, the bird-of-prey threw his arms up into the air. "So I'm the reason why you didn't get your beauty sleep, huh? Geez!"

"Not to mention loud..."

"Don't start with me!" Falco buried a hand into his feathery azure forehead and sighed. "Alright, so I take it we're going to the capital city, then? That's where ole' Pepper usually resides. Unless he's out shooting his buds while hunting under the influence..." A weak chuckle escaped Falco's beak before he cleared his throat.

"Um, correct." replied Aztoph, not quite understanding what he meant by 'hunting under the influence'. _"Who in the right mind would drink alcohol and then hunt?" _he thought, tapping his blunt chin with a finger.

"...You aren't gonna kick his ass, are you?"

"No, no." The cybernetic man shook his head. He pulled his katana from out of its burnt umber sheath, gave it a single whirl and then pointed it at the protective glass shield that divided them from the stars and the black sea. "We're just going to make a surprise entrance that'll dent both the image of him and his inescapable asylum. I mean, sure, throwing me away in such a retched place wasn't very kind, but it doesn't make me want to maul him."

"Right. Speaking of which, we should really get to the bottom of your imprisonment." Falco said. "The General never said why you earned a place in his looney bin. I think it's a bit suspicious."

"And I don't recall doing anything wrong..."

"Yeah. Anyways, we'd better get our asses moving. Pepper ain't gonna come to us."

Falco placed his large hands on the duel control yoke that extended out from the instrument panel, and gave it a light push forward. A stream of emerald flames burst from the yacht's titanium alloy thrusters, and the space vehicle propelled forth. The planet of Corneria grew less and less distant as they approached it at full speed. A violent jolt signaled their atomspheric entry, and the shuddering of the internal structure caused Aztoph's armor to rattle. He cursed when his katana went flying out of his hand after the ship jolted again, and they heard a feint clank in the background of obstreperous noise as it hit the bridge door.

"I never did like this part..." He complained as he fumbled with the straps on his seat. Out of the corner of his visor, Aztoph noticed a familiar embodiment. It zoomed past them at remarkable speeds, and seemed to be unharmed by the harshness of the atomsphere. Aztoph watched it glide ungracefully through the savage envelope until it disappeared from sight. Perplexed, he shook his head and murmured to himself; "Syn-Gyr...?"

"Probably just seeing things, Az." Falco flashed his companion a loop-sided grin. "Plus, there's no way he'd be able to catch up with us _that_ quickly. He walks like a slow shit, so he must fly like a slow shit."

The rumbling ceased forthwith when they exited the atomsphere, and the chaotic scape that surrounded them dissolved into an ocean of clouds, some with a bright orange haze piercing through, which illuminated the luxerious aircraft. The yacht continued to descend -- its speed decreasing when it burst through the final layer of clouds. At last, the bustling captial city came into sight. Falco manuevered the ship around smaller vessels and the towering Cornerian skyscrapers; his azure eyes peering out the glass window in search of a vacant landing pad. The falcon said something under his breath when he spotted one, and after pressing a few buttons, the concealed landing gear extended, and with reckless precision he brought the space craft down -- hard.

Aztoph shook his head and growled. "Nice going."

"Don't mention it." Falco replied, still looking out of the window. "Fuck... I forgot to ask for clearance." He looked at his metal-clad acquaintance and shrugged. "Ah well."

The cyborg unbuckled himself from the co-pilot's seat and lumbered over to where his sword laid. He snatched it from the floor and then heard some distant commotion coming from outside. He peered out from the cockpit window, and caught sight of numerous, heavily-armed shock troops gathering around the yacht. "It seems we have company." Aztoph said as he put his katana away.

The canine soldiers pointed their weapons at the yacht, while an older hound covered in red and gold strode past the assemblage. His arms were placed behind his back, and he wore an obvious look of disdain on his wrinkled face.

"I'll be damned." Falco declared. "Pepper _did_ come to us." The avian pushed another button, and the ramp lowered onto the pad's surface. He walked on down, and as he did so, the soldiers lowered their weaponary. He approached the Cornerian commander-in-chief and greeted him as he would anyone else; "Yo."

"Lombardi, you fool!" General Pepper boomed, "What in the world were you thinking? Not only did the space virus escape from planet Asagia, but you brought that homicidal robot back as well! I put him in there for a reason!"

"Hey man, we finally got sick and tired of the place." Falco explained. "And how the hell were we supposed to know about Syn-whatever? It's your fuckin' asylum..."

"That's beyond the point!" Pepper countered, pushing a stubby index finger into the taller man's chest. "Both of those monsters are utterly murderous!"

"Aztoph? Murderous? Oh c'mon..."

"He is!" Pepper stared up at Aztoph, who stood within the ship's aphotic opening, and shot him an objectionable look. "He slaughtered fifteen of my troops because he saw something he didn't _need_ to see..."

"You got any proof, General?"

The blood hound crossed his arms, scoffing at the mercenary's question. "Proof? You want proof? Come down to the morgue and I'll show you your proof -- piece-by-piece, if it'll so please you."

A savage roar deafened Falco's response, and the soldiers fell to the ground, writhing about while holding their sensative ears. Unfazed yet frantic, General Pepper looked to the skies for the source of the ear-splitting noise. He saw a gigantic creature pass over him like an angel of death, and its shadow seemed to consume everything below.

The creature stopped in mid-air and descended; its hooved-feet shattering the concrete below like a glass window. The impact of its landfall knocked terrified civilians off of their feet, and the alarms of vehicles sounded throughout the city. Ophiuchus, the name of the mammoth beast, bellowed and swung a muscular arm into one of the man-made marvels. It tore straight through the skyscraper's belly, and those inside were either ripped to pieces, or smashed by falling debris when it collapsed onto itself. The denizens of the city watched as the building became nothing more than a huge, smoking pile of rubble.

Ophiuchus raged forth; its long tail ripping able foundations out from underneath elevated highways, causing them to fall on other structures. Cornerian hover cars were kicked out of its path like toys, and unfortunate people were trampled into bloody messes when they came swarming out of their workplaces and their homes. Its rampage came to an abrupt halt as it began to study the imposing building that stood higher than all the rest. Ophiuchus squinted its evil violet eyes and gurgled, and it then became enveloped with a brilliant crimson glow. Those who were still alive ceased their hysterical stampede, and looked on with curious expressions, but their curiousity morphed into horror once the beast opened its maw and launched a tremendous beam of energy. An implosion raced down the building's many stories, and huge chunks of metal rained down and pummeled the surrounding area. The onlookers broke asunder, covering their heads as sharp bits of glass fell like a deadly hail.

Pepper stood wide-eyed and frozen. "No... it can't be..." He let loose a crazed howl. "Andross! He has invaded once again! Colonel! Colonel Desalte!"

A young greyhound wearing an olive green uniform ran up to the General, and gave him a brisk salute. "Yes sir?"

"Call the Star Fox team and tell them to get down here! Immediately!"

"Roger that..." Desalte lifted an eyebrow. "But wait, what about the armada? Can't we just..."

"No! You will keep part of the armada in orbit, to prevent any more of Andross' creatures from making landfall!"

"...What about the rest?"

Pepper's frenzied expression twisted into a grim one. "They're going to Venom with me. Now listen, once the Star Fox team is finished with the monster, their next objective will be to assist me in my battle with Andross. Do not worry about negociating pay -- just tell them that I'll give them anything they want! Understand?"

Desalte blinked. "Yes sir..."

"Get moving!" Pepper then turned to a confused Falco and barked; "Make yourself useful, Lombardi." With that, Pepper and his troops fleeted out of sight with much haste, while Ophiuchus laid waste to other distracts of the capital city. Thick black smoke rose from the crumbled structures, and blanketed the majestic skies, and a swift gust of wind came and scattered the ashes of dead Lylatians and their creations.

Aztoph ran down the yacht ramp. But before he could speak, the blue falcon raced past him. "Falco!" he shouted, "I do hope we are not leaving..."

"No way, man." the avian called back, "Just getting in touch with some old friends." Falco propagated the transmission and tapped his slender fingers, waiting for some kind of reply. A high-pitched answered from the other side, and asked for the sender's identity. "Slippy, it's me, Falco." He shook his head, his ears still ringing from the previous explosions.

"Falco!" Slippy wailed, "Wow, it's been a while. How have you been?"

"Super." He held onto the pilot's chair when the fall of a skyscraper rocked the city with a vicious tremor. After cursing to himself, he continued. "Is Fox still there?"

"Yeah. Lemme go fetch him..."

Seconds passed, and the familiar voice of Fox McCloud soon came through. "Falco? What in the hell's going on down there? We just got a call from Pepper's second-in-command, and he sounded pretty spooked. Something about Andross and a giant monster...?"

"Damned right." The bird-of-prey said. "We got a _giant fuckin' monster_ annihilating the capital city, though I don't think it was sent by our old pal. But hey, Pepper's been obsessed with the possible survival of Andross, as of late..."

"Tell me about it. We gotta go on some wild goose chase afterwards." Fox rubbed his temples, vexed by the mere notion of such a pointless mission objective. He sighed, remembering the urgency of the current situation. "Anyways, keep the monster busy until then, would you? It shouldn't take long for us to arrive. I hope..."

"Roger that. Falco out."

Falco took off again, passing Aztoph and descending the landing ramp's stairway. Once on the broken asphalt below, he ran to his left and to his right, searching for _anything_ of good use against a two-hundred foot leviathan. As he searched, Cornerian fighter aircraft propelled into the air, leading the huge, lumbering cruisers on their path to the suspected culprit of this chaos. He scoffed, wondering why the General couldn't eliminate the problem with his armada, and _then_ go on that wild-goose chase for Andross. Military officials could be a perplexing bunch...

A somewhat bright look came over Falco's face when he spotted a possible solution. He strode over to it and jumped on, noticing the keys were still inserted. He gave them a twist, and the hover bike's engine roared as it came to life. He guided the bike over to the landing pad, and signaled for his cyborg companion to join him. "C'mon!" called Falco. "Get on the bitch seat."

Aztoph crossed his arms and stuck his nose up. "I'm not riding on that thing..."

"Oh yes, you are." Falco smirked. "Now get down here. Or do I have to come up there and trash you?"

Aztoph sighed and took his sweet time down the stairs, approaching the slender vehicle with a hint of circumspection. Grumbling softly, he seated himself behind the avian, causing the bike's rear end to sink to the ground.

"You need to lose some weight." The bird snickered, revving the engine. "Hang on tight, man. If you fall backwards on your ass, I ain't coming back for you."

"Yes... mother." Came the blunt reply from his companion. _"Well, it's better than 'riding bitch.' Oh wait..."_


End file.
